digitalexx (digitalexx) wrote in workingmoms,

Paris's biting - an update

It's now been a little over a month since "the biting". My daughter, Paris will be 21 mos. in a couple of days.

Paris passed the three weeks probationary period like a champ. Her super sunny personality was back in full form the whole time. Now she's back to (somewhat) fulltime day care. I'm still on the early schedule at work (getting to work by 7 instead of 6, though), my husband's dropping her off a little bit earlier (9:30 instead of 10).

I also had a second talk with the day care. My sister convinced me to not give up on them. This time I sat with a different person, someone who knew us and Paris better. I still feel like we got categorized by the higher up woman. She looked at my husband in his dickies, tattoos & scruffy appearance. And me, dressed nicer, but still quite casually. I'm sure she assumed we worked at the burger barn, and not at jobs that require college degrees. He's a computer programmer and his looks the part. I'm a graphic designer. Anyway. I still haven't quite forgiven that lady for the look she had in her eye when we talked, but I just stay away from her.

She had one "attempted bite" a couple of weeks ago, right after she went back to a longer schedule. The teacher didn't report it - she said that she's seen too many kids be kicked out of what she considers a stupid policy (all three of her kids bit). She didn't want to see Paris go since she was there to prevent contact. I think Paris still has it in her, but we've been on it so hard and fast that she's not doing it right now. Also, she's starting to use her words together - such a relief! When we first started with this we could barely get a "no!" out of her when things weren't the way she wanted. Now we're starting to get a "no! my swing!" such a short time later! And no matter how whiny it sounds I say, "good using your words, Paris! Good job!" The attempted bite was also the day they jumped from 4 kids to 10 and it was utter chaos. She said she had kids that never have had behavioral problems act up that day. She said every single one of her "regulars" acted up in some way that day.

The teacher also complimented us - she said she's never had another parent do so much to correct a behavior. I brought in books on not biting and left them there, talked to them constantly about updates on her behavior, bought her teethers at home, so she had them at home too. For the first week or so they went back and forth with her each day. I spent a lot more time with her at day care (I always did spend some time with her there, but I spend more now).

I've discovered that I really like getting to work much earlier. I get out by 3 most days and Paris and I get to hang out together for the afternoon. I make, like, complete, inventive, fun and deliciously healthful dinners now. Usually dinner's being finished as my husband gets home (the liberated woman part of me is disgusted with myself! ;-) ).

We also got a lot better at going to weekend play dates. With the busy holidays, we'd gotten out of the habit. I set up special dates at the playgroup that normally is for SAHM's who meet during the week (I met them all at the breastfeeding support group and I love them all). I joined a local Meetup group for working moms with toddlers, so there's more activities going on when we're free to do them.

Well, anyway. I guess the short of it is we're still at the same day care, and we're hopefully getting past this. :)
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